cornedbeefhashtags:

King David: *plays a regular, non-secret chord*

The Lord:

wongbal:

this is the funniest headline I’ve ever seen

headspace-hotel:

bilbao-moon:

hello i’m hoziest and this is my song i’m already in church

This post implies the existence of Hozey, who is not at church and has no desire to go.

audder17:

Why are the diet ones the only ones that bounce before exploding?

matemisho:

Just girls being girls

tiktoks-we-like:

virtualsentiment:

wow come for my neck like that

maryoliverpdf:

maryoliverpdf:

sincerity is genuinely really hard like…….. if i have ever told you anything heartfelt out loud i have had to battle like 7 layers of embarrassment & repression to do that

the notes on this let’s go to therapy queens

avpdkicking:

anyone else live under the assumption that they’re constantly doing something wrong

emeraldfoxface:

straightboyfriend:

mike’s hard bubble tea

It’s just marbles

The true deadly sins

closetedteenagewitch:

madammuffins:

wheeloffortune-design:

Lust

Not a sin- feeling sexual attraction, sex with consenting partners, masturbation, consuming pornographic media, having several sexual partners, sex before mariage.
IT’S A SIN WHEN- the person projects lust onto an unwilling recipient person and does not take into account their wants or consent. Rape, harassment, sexual assault, catcalling, dick pics.

Gluttony

Not a sin- food, enjoying food, cooking, eating sweets, eating meat. In the larger sense, accumulating material things you enjoy, like books or collectibles or whatever. 
IT’S A SIN WHEN- It deprives other people of what they need.

Envy

Not a sin: Wanting things you see other people have, like money, power, fame.
IT’S A SIN WHEN: This is how you define people, and stop respecting them as humans. It’s a sin when you use them for what they have and what they can bring you.

Greed

Not a sin: Wanting financial security, working hard for the things you want. 
IT’S A SIN WHEN: Your own financial growth depends on keeping other people impoverished and suffering.

Pride

Not a sin: Being proud of your accomplishments, liking your looks, dressing up
IT’S A SIN WHEN: It stops you from accepting your faults and seeing how you can be wrong, not admitting that you can better yourself. 

Wrath

Not a sin: Righteous anger at situations, being mistreated, seeing other people suffer, at the injustice of the world. Self-defense. Revolution. 
IT’S A SIN WHEN: Violence towards defenceless people, hitting your partner or your kids,.  Violence fuelled by intolerance and bigotry. 

Sloth

Not a sin: Resting. Sleeping. Taking a day or a year off. Being unproductive. Playing videogames.
IT’S A SIN WHEN: You stay inactive when action is required. When people need you and you’d rather do nothing.

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT AND GIVES POWER BACK TO SO MANY PEOPLE

Say it sgain for the people in the back

stopmopingstarthoping:

mcelboycontent:

hearing the john mulaney “do my friends hate me or do i just need to go to sleep” bit is the best thing to have happened for my mental health because every time i’m afraid my friends hate me it’s around the time i should be going the fuck to sleep

I read somewhere “if you feel like everyone hates you you need to sleep and if you feel like you hate everyone else you need to eat” and it was honestly world-shattering and I wish I’d heard it years ago!